Everyone say Mac 'N' Cheese!!

Those poor kids on Kid Nation...if only someone there knew how to cook, their pasta wouldn't be so mushy! Didn't they know the water should come to a rolling boil before you add the macaroni? Sehr traurig, ja.

I LOVE CHEESE. I love it almost as much as I love bacon, and you know I love bacon. I think the beauty of mac 'n' cheese is that you can put ANY cheese you want into your meal...it might not always work so nicely, but at least it's your own creation.

I make my mac 'n' cheese with penne pasta, cooked a minute under al dente, and then let it finish cooking in the oven. I find the ridges in the penne really hold the sauce nicely. Starting with a basic bechamel sauce (more on that later...should the milk be hot or cold you might ask?), I added grated fontina, gruyere, and white aged cheddar on this particular occassion because I could, or maybe that's what happened to be in my fridge. Oh, and I like to add a teensy dollop of whole grain and dijon mustards. Then a little bit of the pasta water to loosen up the cheese and we're cookin'! I find that toastin' Panko bread crumbs in butter before topping off the dish really adds a deeper golden crust, and I love me some crispy crust set against a creamy backdrop of cheesy goodness. I suppose you could add cream if you wanted, but why the extra calories? A little time in the oven and the house is sure smellin' good.

Mmm mmm mmm...A simple salad dressed with Morgenster cold extracted olive oil from the Stellenbosch region of South Africa and some balsamic fig vinegar from upstate California and you've got yourself a complete meal! Oh, and don't forget the vino. This time--an Amarone della Valpolicella.

Wish you could have a creamy but also crunchy bite,
Foodsnob

Pancakes

Apologies for being absent. I was up in Copperopolis. I kid thee not. There is a town about 2 hours east of San Francisco and it's called Copperopolis. No lie. Anyway, I was there for a whole week enjoying the 110 degree weather, the lake with the dead bodies in it, and being the only non-Caucasian person there.

Anyway, back to the topic of food--I made blueberry pancakes for breakfast recently and forgot how delicious blueberries are with maple syrup and pancakes. Usually I opt for strawberries, but thanks to all the frozen berries in my freezer, I was feeling a little blue that morning. A quick warming through of the frozen berries with some vanilla sugar and a touch of Canadian maple syrup and I was in business.

For the pancakes themselves, here is a recipe I've committed to memory for as long as I can remember...

1/2 cup all-purpose flour
1/2 tsp baking soda
2 tsp sugar
pinch of salt
2 eggs, separated
1/2 cup buttermilk

Mix together dry ingredients. Add the buttermilk to the yolks. Whip the whites until stiff but not dry. Mix dry ingredients with buttermilk mixture until just combined. Fold in the whites. It's OK if it's not fully combined. The less combined the more ethereal and fluffy your pancakes! Cook your pancakes in some butter. Mine usually end up being about only 3 inches in diameter. Cute and delicious.

Please don't buy that prepackaged pancake mix. If you LOVE pancakes, you can place all the dry ingredients in a tupperware and just shake before use, but none of that boxed stuff...I beg of you!

Wish you could have a bite,
Foodsnob

Blueberry Muffins for Breakfast

A benefit of having frozen berries at the ready is you can whip up muffins in a pinch. Seriously, though, muffins don't take long at all. So long as you tie yourself over with a banana and a glass of freshly squeezed grapefruit juice you'll be fine. An hour later you'll have your muffins and be late for your "job" or whatever it is you do.

What you CAN do, though, is prep the muffin mix the night before. Separate the wet from the dry, keep them in the fridge. When you wake up, preheat your oven and grease your muffin tins. Whatever recipe you may use, try substituting some sour cream as part of the liquid (whether it be milk, buttermilk, or yogurt.) There's nothing better. The key is, of course, need I say it???? Do NOT overmix. Stir with a chopstick if that helps. Barely moistened...I like to top my muffins with however I'm feeling that day. Crushed almonds, butter, brown sugar, a touch of flour?

Jump in the shower and by now your timer should just be going off, unless you're a water whore.

I think I ate four of these. Me not too smart.

Wish a bite you could have,
Foodsnob

PS By the way I totally burned my fingers with boiling blueberry juice as I was trying to take this pic.

Morning After

Biscuit Recipe SHHHHHH!!!! It's a secret!!!

2 cups all-purpose flour
2 1/2 tsp baking powder
1/2 tsp baking soda
1/2 tsp salt
6 T f$*king cold butter, cubed
7/8 cup uber cold buttermilk
melted butter, cooled (for brushing tops, optional)

Preheat oven to 425. Whisk together dry ingredients. Using a pastry cutter or working quickly with your hands, cut in the butter until it resembles coarse crumbs. It's OK to leave some lumps. (When the heat hits the butter, it turns to steam and creates the fluffy layers.)

Using a wooden spoon, stir in the buttermilk until the mixture just comes together. Dump out onto a cold pastry stone (or whatever you might have) and GENTLY knead until light and gorgeous, no more than 6 turns. It's tempting, yes, but don't do it.

Gently roll to 3/4" and cut with 1 1/2" to 2" biscuit rounds that have been dusted in flour. Having a clean cut ensures a better rise in the dough.

Brush the tops with melted butter, or more buttermilk, and bake for 11-13 minutes until golden. Take pics, send to me, then serve immediately.

Go make those biscuits!
Foodsnob

Biscuits Biscuits Biscuits

Biscuits remind me of my homeland...the hot humid summers, mosquitoes galore, little Asian kids running barefoot. Sound like Vietnam? Think again. Think the American South. Think Virginia.

Do you think about fried chicken and biscuits when you think about the South? Do you even THINK about the South ever? Yes I am ashamed that Virginia was part of the Confederacy, but I forgive Mr. Robert E. Lee. It wasn't his fault. His momma probably convinced him to stay with her tasty Southern delights.

So, I freakin' LOVE biscuits. I love carbs in general. I made these to go with a chicken soup I'd made for lunch. I know there are tons of biscuit recipes out there, but what it really comes down to is technique. How many times do I have to say DO NOT OVERMIX? DO NOT OVERMIX. And, REALLY COLD ingredients. Scones and biscuits are in the same category. Rock hard = bad.

If you want my biscuit recipe which I've painstakingly developed over the years, I'll post it up for you :)

Go test out your biscuit hand!
Foodsnob

Berries for Breakfast

I think one of my favorite weekend breakfasts is challah french toast with a fresh berry compote. I get my challah from Canter's, always uncut...very un-Jewlike...oh, sorry, wrong blog. That way I can make my slices as thick as I like 'em to be. Mmm.

Anyway, if the berries are really sweet and fresh (which is such a rarity these days) I might opt for keeping them fresh sprinkled with some vanilla sugar and grated lemon zest. However, cooking them down a bit with some sugar and water usually results in a more palatable accompaniment to the toast. I even like to add maple syrup at the very end for that extra bit of sweetness.

It's really important to add your water and sugar at the beginning of cooking, as adding it later on will give you a gummy texture, and that's not delicious, is it?

Oh, and something else I like to do (there's ALWAYS something.) I buy a TON of berries at their peak season, freeze them on a flat tray so they don't stick to each other, then date and bag them. That way I have berries for months on end.

Add a little berry to your breakfast. Everybody's doing it!

Foodsnob

Chocolate Grand Marnier Cake

What do you do with 5 bars of Valrhona 71% chocolate? Hmm...I've got it!! Melt down 3 of them, add some eggs, Grand Marnier, a touch of flour (or cocoa if you're really hardcore), and bake it. With the other 2 bars, make a ganache for the icing on the cake.

I'm a huge fan of grand marnier, as you may know. The combination of orange and chocolate is divine. Try dipping orange zest (but not the pith, as that is bitter) in a chocolate ganache and make your own chocolate orange peels. I can't seem to shake this chocolate obsession. Oh well.

WARNING: This cake is not for the faint of heart. Perfect with raspberries, tea, coffee, or ice cream. If you'd like the recipe, please let me know and I'll post!

Wish you could have a bite,
Foodsnob

Why's it gotta be about black and white???

Sometimes it should just be about GREY (SALT.) Now grey salt is pretty damn spectacular. An unprocessed sea salt hailing from the Brittany coast of France, its slightly moist crystals deliver an oceanic punch straight to your mouth, which also means you don't need to use a lot.

The grey hue comes from all the minerals present in the salt, including magnesium, iron, zinc, potassium, sulfur, copper, silicon, iodine, among others. I love finishing off salads, fish and meat with this stuff, and also cook with it. I love it in stocks and soups as well, adding it during the cooking process and then to finish it off.

And please, none of that table salt. At least go Kosher. You'll also start using less salt on your food.

Have a little salt tasting. You'll really notice the difference!!!

No matter how you spell it, it's great,
Foodsnob

PS It even says "flavorful" on the label. Now are you really going to challenge that?

Burrata How I Love Thee

Let me count the ways...

with gray salt, cracked pepper, extra virgin olive oil

melted on a hamburger with roasted tomato, rocket and crispy prosciutto

on crostini with roasted red bell peppers and basil

a la caprese

fresh heirloom tomatoes and torn basil

atop a bed of penne

with pancetta, rocket, and tomato on toasted ciabatta (BLT ish)

...

in my belly

PS To make crostini, cut a baguette on the bias, brush on olive oil, sprinkle with S&P and bake for 10 minutes at 400 F. Delicioso e semplice.

Yet another beautiful YELLOW food

First egg yolks, now CORN! Love it. 'Tis the season, so go get some. As pictured in my SMORES post, I like to grill corn still in its husk. I don't like rubbery blackened corn. Keeps it crunchy al dente, and also keeps the carcinogens in check if you're worried about that sort of thing.

I like my corn raw if it's super sweet, but one of my favs is sauteeing it in butter with leeks, seasoned with salt and pepper, then tossed with chiffonade of basil. A perfect summer side dish to grilled fish or chicken.

Come and get it!
Foodsnob

Iced Green Tea

Nothing refreshes like iced green tea.


Aerated water, brought to just before the boiling point.


Matcha powder.


Electrical whisk.


Wish you could have a sip,
Foodsnob

20 Minute Meal--Eat THAT Rachael Ray!!!

Sorry Rachael...I'm competitive, and this quick fix is both healthy and pretty on the plate.

On the lunch menu:

Pan-seared center cut pork loin w/ a shallot and white wine reduction
Spinach w/ pignoli and cranberries

STEP ONE: Dry off your pork cuts completely. (This reduction of moisture ensures a nice golden crust, but you already knew that because of an earlier blog and if not shame on you.) Pat on crushed black pepper, freshly ground of course. Sprinkle on some gray salt. Drizzle a hot skillet with EVOO (as Rachael likes to call it) and a pat of unsalted butter if you can afford the pounds. Get out that bottle of buttery Chardonnay you drank from last night, or this morning if you're a wine-o like myself.

STEP TWO: Pan fry your cuts for 4-5 minutes per side. Don't play with them either. Let them sear to perfection. While this is going on, wash and dry your spinach and heat a second skillet with some more EVOO. Add some pignolis until slightly toasted, then add your spinach and dried cranberries. Wilt spinach. This should take just a few minutes. Remove from heat.

STEP THREE: By now your pork is perfect, so transfer onto a plate and let rest--cover with foil. Chop some shallots and add to the pan (or you could've done this in step two if you're a serious multi-tasker). Cook for a minute or two, then add a couple splashes of your white wine. Reduce a bit, and off the heat add a pat of butter you big fatty.

STEP FOUR: Enjoy your somewhat healthy lunch with the same wine you cooked with. I promise this meal in my photo wasn't nuked for the picture. Everything should be perfectly hot. Always cook with wine you would drink. ALWAYS. And please please please never buy that "COOKING WINE." All it is is oversalted cheap wine.

STEP FIVE: Comment on my blog to thank me for helping you get lucky with that chic you were trying to impress with your cooking know-how.

Have a bite for yourself,
Foodsnob

PS Next time try fennel-encrusted pork chops! YUM-O.

Chocolate Makes Everything Better

There are two things that make the world go round--money and chocolate, but not necessarily in that order. This morning for breakfast I made banana bread. Bad idea. If you're hungry, make eggs and toast. By the time it was finished I was basically cramped over with hunger pangs, but it was worth it. You know why? Because I added dark chocolate chunks that's why!!

There are a bizillion recipes for banana bread out there, but you gotta own it. Using any standard banana bread recipe, make it your own. I like to add coconut and dark chocolate to mine, and even if you're not a fan of coconut, trust me on this one. Just like the carrot cake, the coconut adds just enough texture and interest, but doesn't overwhelm the bread.

Also, I like my banana bread to be extra moist, so instead of mashing the bananas to the consistency of mashed potatoes I use a fork and just break it up into small chunks. Add to your wet ingredients (sometimes I use buttermilk, but this morning I used Greek yogurt), making sure they are at room temperature, and fold in your sifted dry ingredients. As always, DO NOT OVERMIX. There's nothing worse than developing the gluten...

Wish you could have a bite and a sip of my tea latte,
Foodsnob

Who Cut the Cheese???

PHOTO: My lunch today. Not pictured: crostini drizzled with olive oil, sea salt and cracked black pepper lightly toasted to perfection.

So while in Aspen, we ate lunch at a cute place called The Wild Fig, where we ordered charcuterie and queso (and of course a nice cab, which later proved to be a bad idea as we hiked Hanging Lake). Yum anyway. What I liked best, however, was how they served the cheese. If you want to give your platter a more rustic look, opt to NOT cut it into those rectangles. Besides, it's rude to cut the cheese in public.

Rather, using the point of your 10-inch uber sharp chef's knife (or whatever inferior knife you may have) break it off into chunks. In particular, pecorino, parmeggiano reggiano, or a blue cheese will work nicely utilizing this technique. Make little piles, and pile up the prosciutto, dried figs, basil leaves, walnuts, or whatever else you have on hand.

Also, having your cheese at room temperature is a must--just like how you should never refrigerate your tomatoes, but I'll save that for another day.

Enjoy your gorgeous cheese and meat platter!

Wish you could have a bite,
Foodsnob

MORE Than Just SMORES

I just got back from camping in the Rockies, and what better way to end a day of roughin' it than to roast up some smores? OK, just because you're in the middle of nowhere doesn't mean you can't kick it up a notch. No, not by adding some essence of Emeril, (although that would certainly kick up those burgers.)

I'm talking about dipping your marshmallows in some Grand Marnier before roasting them. Oh my goodness. Maui Wowie. Delicioso nervoso. Ginormously good. Did you know that "ginormous" is officially a word in the Merriam-Webster dictionary?

So next time you go camping...scratch that...next time you're making smores over the BBQ, and heaven forbid you make them in the oven, try this one out. Impress your friends. Just don't sear your eyebrows--or theirs.

And one more thing for the perfectly roasted marshmallow--indirect heat. (Ignore the picture where it looks like very direct heat. NOTE: I wasn't holding this marshmallow, OBVIOUSLY.) Also, here's a pic of me grilling corn, but I think I blinked in this one...

Wish you could have a bite,
Foodsnob

RED VELVET, carpet or dessert?

Red velvet and that little boy's smile. Red velvet with that slow southern style. A new religion that'll bring you to your knees. Red velvet if you please. Or black velvet. Whatever. I never know the lyrics to songs.

Who invented red velvet? Who would think to ever add vinegar to a cake? Sounds strange, but apparently this results in a chemical reaction with the baking powder and buttermilk which deepens the signature red color of the cake. Brilliant. Absolutely brilliant.

Forgive me for not making this a triple-tiered cake. I only have two springform cake pans.

Need I say more?
Foodsnob

PS For more on this cake, check out this NY Times article.

What the PHO?

pho [ /fə/ or /fʌ/ ] , rhymes with huh?

noun: the best damn Vietnamese noodle dish in the galaxy.

If you've never had pho in a cafeteria-like setting with servers who actually speak Vietnamese, and where the cafe sua da (Vietnamese iced coffee made with sweetened condensed milk) comes in individual filters for you with a big glass of ice on the side, then you've never had pho. OK, sure, there are some pretty cool pho cafes and Vietnamese restaurants that serve this culinary delight, but unless you've gone to a no frills cafe, it just isn't the same.

I ain't talkin' bout no Korean pho (no offense to my Korean friends) where you can eat it at all hours of the day. True pho is like chicken soup for the soul...except that it's made with beef and lightly toasted spices including cloves, star anise, and sometimes Saigon cinnamon (I prefer to leave it out). The broth should be clear, not cloudy--an indicator of inferior quality. Another indicator of true pho are the accoutrements: Thai basil, mung bean sprouts, limes, saw leaf lettuce, mint, onions, Sriracha hot sauce, hoison sauce. I personally don't add hoison. And go easy on the hot sauce--it'll definitely sneak up on you.

So next time you have pho, ask yourself, "Is this really pho? Do the servers speak Vietnamese? Are the appropriate accoutrements present? Am I sweating uncontrollably?"

Pho that makes you sweat is H-O-T. Take a blind date to have pho, see what happens, maybe videotape it, and email me.

Wish you could have a bowl,
Foodsnob

Lemongrass Vodka

I just made some lemongrass vodka. I'm cooking up some PHO BO this weekend so I figured some "exotic Asian" cocktails would accompany the spring rolls quite nicely. It's so easy to make...I think the hardest part about making it is finding fresh lemongrass. What I do, then, is buy a ton of lemongrass whenever I'm down in Little Saigon and freeze it whole. Works like a charm. That way, whenever I'm in the mood for lemongrass beef over rice vermicelli noodles served with "nuoc mam" on the side, I can make it in a snap (sort of not really.)

To make this delicious vodka, just infuse vodka with freshly chopped lemongrass and steep for at least 24 hours and up to a week. Another way of adding a hint of this refreshing herb to your cocktail if you haven't prepared in advance is steeping it in your simple syrup, which is equal parts sugar to water, heated through until the sugar dissolves.

I think I'll make a lemongrass martini using the vodka, lime juice, and a touch of simple syrup, garnished with a kaffir leaf or piece of lemongrass. Or maybe I'll make a mojito with the vodka, freshly grated ginger, and muddled mint leaves. The possibilities are endless...

Try something exotic. Like I said months ago, lemongrass is the new lavendar.

Cheers!
Foodsnob

PS Thanks for the mason jars, opus2.

Not just your every day CARROT CAKE

Carrot cake is one of those hit or miss desserts. It always looks and sounds SO good, but hardly ever delivers. Why? Why?

I don't know, that's why I'm asking! So, I never order it anymore, unless it's one of the offerings at a really really shi-shi restaurant. I just make it at home for myself and others. And I must admit, this last cake I made was pretty awesome. Just look at the picture. And yes, this one tasted as good as it looks. I'm sure it doesn't hurt that it has 1 1/2 cups of canola oil in the cake and 2 sticks of butter in the frosting.

I think the secret to a moist carrot cake is combining the oil and the eggs until completely emulsified. I use a food processor for that. I also double sift the dry ingredients and fold them into the carrots, shredded coconut, and crushed, drained pineapple. No raisins or nuts. Then I barely stir in the wet ingredients.

I don't know. I'm no professional baker. Just a professional snob.

Wish you could have a bite. Seriously, though, don't you?

Xoxox,
Foodsnob